THE MOUNT PERRY CHRONICLES 3
STORIES ABOUT LIFE IN MOUNT PERRY FLORIDA
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Here MOUNT PERRY Rises Majestically In Back Of
LAKE MOUNT PERRY.
This Picture Has Been Cheerfully Donated By The
SKY MOUNT PERRY, FLORIDA, FOUNDATION
In this third Mount Perry Chronicles Book, I continue to spin the tale of life in
our beautiful town. Here's a sample chapter.
PLASTIC SPIDERS
Copyright ©2001 Robert P. Herbst. All rights reserved.

By

Robert P. Herbst
The celebration of The Hallowed Weiner, (known elsewhere as Halloween) is now
only a dim memory for another year, here in Mount Perry, Florida. It was time to
clean up all the trappings from this gala holiday event.
As I picked up all the plastic hot dogs placed about in our shop for little children to
find, I came across two plastic spiders sitting quietly on their plastic web. I just
couldn’t bring myself to be pack them away for another year.
As I boxed the rest holiday items I began to think the plastic spiders looked kind of
cute sitting there on their little plastic web and decided to leave them in place for a
while.
As I worked back and forth past the two spiders I suddenly noticed they were
catching little plastic flies. As the plastic flies struggled in the plastic web, the plastic
spiders advanced on their prey just like real spiders would have done. It was
fascinating to watch although I had no idea what food value the plastic spiders got
from their plastic prey.
After about a week I noticed there was a large plastic spider egg in the plastic web.
Obviously I was about to be host to a multitude of baby plastic spiders. I watched
with great interest as the two plastic spiders went about their grisly chores of feeding
the plastic spider egg.
At long last the big day arrived and the plastic spider egg slowly opened releasing
hundreds of baby plastic spiders. Much to my dismay there baby spiders rapidly
infested every corner of my shop.
At this point one must understand that I don’t like spiders. Now I was host to
hundreds of them. They were spinning their little plastic webs in every corner of my
shop. Just how does one go about ridding themselves of an infestation of plastic
spiders? I was completely at a loss.
At first I tried insecticides but this was a waste of money. These were plastic spiders
and I couldn’t find any insecticide that would work on plastic spiders. I had to do
something and do it quickly. The little spiders were growing larger by the day. As
they grew, they spun larger plastic webs.
The whole shop was beginning to look like something out of a horror movie with
plastic web draped over everything in the shop. People were afraid to come into the
shop. I began catching the baby plastic spiders and releasing them outside the shop
but it was a hopeless effort. There were just too many of them.
I had to do something or my shop would quickly be overrun with plastic spiders.
Over coffee the next morning I devoted my thoughts to this very subject. What was
I going to do about an infestation of plastic spiders? There didn’t seem to be any
answer to the problem.
I took a trip to the local J-Mart to see if there was something, somewhere in that
huge store I could use. After several hours of walking up one isle and down the next
I was about to give up and start packing.
On my way out of the store, I happened by the pet section. There on the shelf was a
plastic lizard. I couldn’t help but wonder if a plastic lizard would eat a plastic spider?
Hey! For fifty cents I could find out for sure. I bought a plastic lizard and brought it
to the shop with me.
I placed the Plastic lizard on the counter in the front of the shop and sat back to
watch what happened. I had pointed the lizard at the first plastic spider’s plastic
spider web. The plastic lizard moved forward ever so slowly, toward the plastic
spider web and the two plastic spiders there on.
When it was within range it lunged forward and ate both plastic spiders with great
gusto and lip smacking. The plastic lizard, sensing other spiders around began
systematically hunting them down and eating them. It was truly a grisly sight to have
to watch.
However, with all the trouble the plastic spiders had caused me, I resisted the
impulse to turn away and I watched the decimation of the plastic spider population.
The plastic lizard was very thorough, it ate every plastic spider with equal relish.
As it ate the plastic spiders, the plastic lizard grew in size. Now I have a seven foot
long plastic monitor lizard skulking about in my shop and I don’t dare wear anything
plastic anywhere on my body.
My books are available from me at <herbst@fairpoint.net> price and shipping charges
on request. I can't make a set price as shipping cost and printing prices vary from
week to week.
Unless instructed otherwise this book will be sent out Via Priority Mail. There is no
return policy, all sales are final. No book will be shipped without cash in hand. You may
also find my books at:
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